Last Sunday there was an open house at the newly remodeled fire station on the west side of town. It's hard to tell who was more excited about it--John or Edward. However, Edward almost didn't get to go due to his current behavior pattern, but more on that later. In the end, he and John went (Daniel was still napping) and had a great time. They even brought home an extra hat for Daniel, who was quite pleased, not knowing what he'd missed.

John said Ed wanted to sit in every seat in every truck and wear the seat belt each time. That's a lot of in and out and up and down.

He had to be persuaded to leave his own gear (left over Halloween costume) at home, but he was sure to wear his favorite new (this season) hand-me-down from Arizona: the emergency vehicle t-shirt. As soon as it comes out of the wash, it's what he picks from his drawer. I have a feeling Sean was the same way and that it will not survive to be worn by Daniel!

John says he had to snap this helmet photo quickly because Edward was saying, with exertion, "It's heavy, Dad!"

He was also eager to point out the features of the vehicles, like the spinning light on the front of this truck. I think John was most impressed with the fact that the living area was built with individual sleeping rooms rather than the standard open bunk room. John once spent 24 hours with a shift of Iowa City firefighters to write a story for the newspaper and I think that communal sleeping experience left a permanent scar (though, if I recall correctly there were several calls that night and not much sleeping.) He also went through the full training regimen for the volunteer fire fighters in a neighboring town (again, in the line of newspaper duty.) So I think it's safe to say that this was one of those "for the kids" trips that was not too great a burden on the adult.

Also last weekend, one of John's co-workers dropped off a toy her own boys had outgrown. It's been passed around through several generations in her own family and among friends, so we're not sure how old it is. However, it is proof positive that the best toys are timeless: our boys LOVE it. It's quite heavy (no plastic construction back in the day!) so Ed doesn't go too far on it before he gets tired. Daniel can't reach the pedals so we have to bend over and push it up and down until he gets impatient and climbs off. Luckily he has a short attention span--kind of tough on the back! The sharing is not going as well as this picture would make it seem, but we're working on it--with this and MANY other toys and activities.

Which brings us to the behavior issues. My wise mom says kids have periods of "equilibrium and disequilibrium." Edward is definitely in disequilibrium these days. I have read some similar theories that suggest that growth surges have both physical and emotional components. Basically, Edward is a walking time bomb these days. Everything can be going along just fine but then one thing isn't exactly the way he wants it and it's a total meltdown. He also is testing limits and patience like it's going out of style. We try to correct bad behavior with a simple, "No thank you" or "Please don't do that." We know it's going to escalate when he looks right at us and again repeats whatever we've asked him not to do. Or, even more aggravating, he'll watch/listen as we tell Daniel No, and then go out of his way to do whatever Daniel had been doing to bring on the correction. It's all very frustrating and has led to several knock-down/drag-out battles, including one that almost lost him the fire station tour. Luckily, that one was right before naps so that allowed a cooling off period and calm prevailed.

The emotional drama is not just naughty though. This week, for only the second time in three-and-a-half years, Edward clung to me and refused to let me leave him at daycare. He and five of his classmates had moved up to the next age group classroom on Monday. Several of the kids had a rough morning the first day, but not Ed. He just marched right in like he owned the place. He's spent time in the room before and knows the teachers. But Wednesday and Thursday the main teacher was home sick. On Wednesday, he had a mid-morning meltdown that was calmed with some teacher one-on-one time. But Thursday, when we got there and he realized that his teacher wasn't there again, he grabbed my legs and would not let go. I actually took him with me to an appointment before work because I could see that I would not be able to extricate fast enough to make it on time any other way.

While we were driving to and from the appointment I tried talking about all the things he likes at school, asking him about his buddies and trying to get him to talk about all the fun things they do. I emphasized that kids go to school and moms and dads go to work. He said he wanted to come to work with me.
"Edward," I said. "I don't have any toys or books or colors at my office. I don't have a playground like you have at school."
"But I could just stand there and watch you," he said. Yeah, for how many seconds?
"But Edward, why would you want to do that instead of playing with your buddies.?"
"Because I like you Mommy."

Oh, a direct hit to the heart.

I took him back to school and he was fine until we got to his classroom. He again grabbed on to me and would not let go. I tried to talk to him calmly and let him know I loved him and that I knew he was going to have fun with all his buddies. But finally I just had to pry his arms from around my neck and hand him to a teacher screaming. If you think I made it out of there without tears of my own, you have a stone heart. But within about half an hour, two different staff members called me at work to let me know he was doing better. He was still tentative and one of them, the school cook, told me he kept asking her when lunch would be (this is at about 9:30 a.m.) He knows I pick him up after lunch so he was clearly marking time.

Friday was better. The teacher was back and he had a pine cone and a rock to show off. I am hoping we don't have to start all over this week. I guess all we can do is continue to teach self control but also offer plenty of praise for good behavior. Hugs are the order of the day whenever possible.