While reading a book to the boys this week, I had to stop and show them the text to explain that when a character said he "liked" having a dog drooling all over him, he really meant the opposite. We talked about this for a bit, coming up with other examples, and then moved on with the story.

Fast forward to this afternoon: Waiting for our check-out paperwork at the doctor's office the boys started to sword fight with the pens attached to the desk by chains. I said firmly, "Put the pens down now and don't touch them again." Daniel promptly picked his back up and started again. "Daniel, you have lost your dessert for the rest of the day." I practically had to carry him out as he wailed at the unfairness of it all, "You didn't say there would be a punishment!"

He screamed all the way home (thankfully it's only 5 minutes) and as we were pulling into the driveway I heard from the back seat, "OK, I really did know there would be a punishment."

This level of self-awareness was quite shocking, but still, I said, "Well I'm glad to hear you say that."

"NO!" he screamed. "I was using AIR QUOTES!"